Don’t get me wrong, I love this picture. But I hate it, too, all at the same time.

It doesn’t look like what it’s “supposed” to look like. It’s missing someone. One person short of the “family wedding picture” I thought would always be in our wedding album.

When I see it, my eyes get narrow, my head tilts to the right and my lips get pushed to the side. Every time.
I can get hung up with the fact that dad’s life was just too short, I can get mad at circumstances or try to find someone to blame.

Instead, I lean into the pain instead of running away from it. I scream “I’m not scared of you” right in it’s face when it reminds me of future moments he won’t be a part of. I smile knowing that it’s just a piece of my story, not the whole one.

Instead of looking at my story and asking “why this?” I’ll ask “how can I use it?”
I’m no expert and I’m not perfect, I’m just tired of trying it my way.
You have the same choice too, friend.
And trust me, it’s much more fun His way.

So why would you fear the future if His goodness and love pursued you all the days of your life (Psalm 23:6)?