There's nothing wrong with being "emotional"
We all have those methods to hold back our tears. Whether that be breathing in deeply, blinking really fast, looking up, you name it. For me, my eyes always get watery at "the worst moments" around the people I don't want to cry in front of, the place I don't want to be upset, you get the gist. Me wanting to cry and not being able to, or feeling restricted, makes it even harder to hold it all back.
Sometimes my tears come out and I feel like I have to apologize because I made a moment awkward. Or, if I'm really honest with you, I apologize because I don't want them to think it's normal for me. I don't want others to think that I'm weak. Yeah, none of us want to look weak. So we hold it in, we "suck it up," we "keep it together," we show our strength through our resistance and fight of emotion.
But really, the restraint you put on yourself to actual deal with your emotions is weak. You not wanting to offend someone else or make someone else uncomfortable or God forbid, ruin your "strong" reputation, is something a lot of us strive for.
I'm currently really interested in infants and the processes they go through. I learned that when an infant is born, the first sign of it's health is a loud strong cry or scream. If they don't cry or they don't scream, doctors start to become concerned because their lungs aren't strong enough.
Funny huh? That when we were little it was weird if we didn't cry (and our cry actually showed strength) and somewhere from then to now, crying has become a sign of one being frail. I don't know if y'all have ever read Lamentations but the whole thing is someone being honest with God, being honest with themselves and their emotions. Crying when they need to, dancing and rejoicing when they need to, taking a deep breath and praising God because they need to.
Since when did we become a society who frowns upon vulnerability, who cringes when we say, "honestly?" who's response when someone says walking quickly past you, "hey, how are you?" "good" when you're really not.
Another fun fact about babies: when the baby develops and they're able to gain more synapses inside their brain, they have the capability to laugh (a connection from the head to the heart).
Let's vow to be for real, to be honest, to not neglect the power of our emotions and they way that the Lord gave it to us to reflect his story and the work within our heart.
Laugh when you wanna, cry when you wanna, talk to someone when you wanna.